I’ve met her: the mom who has changed my motherhood game in a major way. Her name is Seasoned Mom, and she is amazing.
Seasoned Mom has 5 children. Can we just let that sink in for a minute? Wow. To say that she has been there and done that would be an understatement, but it is completely true. Seasoned Mom is unfazed. Period. She exudes confidence and seems deeply grounded in general but especially in motherhood. She’s “got this” in the most humble and unassuming way. She just oozes experience, calmness, and control.
My initial encounter with her was in the lobby while I was watching M take a class. Seasoned Mom was there too along with her 4 other children who were also watching their sister. Wouldn’t you expect 4 boys in a small lobby for an hour to be quite the situation?! Not for Seasoned Mom. Those boys were calm, respectful, and quiet. I didn’t hear one bit of whining, and my 18 month old toddler wreaked more havoc on that lobby than all of Seasoned Mom’s boys combined.
“I told them to pack some toys,” she said. “I told them class was an hour, and that they needed to make sure they had enough to do.” Simple as that. And it worked. Beautifully. To be fair, her boys are a little bit older, but the point is that Seasoned Mom did not feel responsible for providing the entertainment for her children. She expected them to do that, and they rose right up to meet those expectations.
Our next encounter was the following week. Our daughters are required to use the restroom before participating in class, and once the activity begins they are expected to wait until the end of class to use the restroom again. One of the little girls said she needed to use the bathroom which prompted all the little ones to feel like they needed to do the same/ The teacher came out and told Seasoned Mom that her daughter was saying she needed to leave class to go to the restroom. Seasoned Mom missed not. a. beat. “No,” she said with COMPLETE confidence. “She just went. Tell her she can wait.”
What?! I feel like a three year old who says she needs to use the restroom is like a ticking time bomb. Also, my response would have sounded more like this: “Really? She’s saying that? Well…. I mean….. she just went a few minutes ago…..but…..I guess I can take her again. Do you really think she needs to go?” Seasoned Mom didn’t waver though. She knew what was expected of her children both from herself and others. She intended for them to uphold those expectations, and she was going to make sure that happened. The best part about Seasoned Mom is that she does all of this with love, gentleness, confidence, and humility. She’s not demanding or intimidating. She’s not frustrated or frazzled. She just is. And you know what? Her children reflect that 100%. They are calm, centered, and peaceful because that is the environment in which they live.
Is she perfect? Probably not, but I like to think she is. Does she have her moments? I guess. Although I would rather think it’s always rainbows and lollipops around her. I can say with certainty, however, that she inspires me as a mother. I’ve learned from her in a very short time just how far being centered in yourself, centered in motherhood, confidence, and grace can take you.
Find the joy~